Sometimes it takes a lot of time and effort to meet the person who seems to be a perfect match for you. Sometimes you need only a few minutes to fall in love with a stranger and get ready to spend all your life together. In both cases, a feeling of mutual love is amazing for sure. Still, there are cases when a person deals with conditional love. Do you know how hard it is? Discovering its meaning, signs, and efficient recommendations from experts of ukrainian-ladies.net will let you avoid the unpleasant consequences of conditional love if one day you deal with it.
Detailed Conditional Love Definition
Perhaps you have some general idea of what conditional love is. Still, it is important to learn a full conditional love meaning not to confuse it with another feeling. So, it is a kind of affection that is possible only if you meet some expectations. Being a kid, you might come across examples of conditional love regularly. This is when your mother says that she will be proud of you only if you get high grades, or when the father admits your uniqueness only in case of high sports achievements. In fact, there are much more examples, but, undoubtedly, you got a general idea. So, conditional love is a common feeling that many people may deal with during their whole life. Still, it can’t be a good ground for a healthy relationship, especially a romantic one. If you start noticing that your partner loves you conditionally, then you’d better find out signs of conditional love to be unsure.
9 Signs of Conditional Love
Unfortunately, not everybody can recognize conditional love at once. For example, a typical Ukrainian girl is used to believing in love at first sight and a happy ever after. She even does not think that feelings may be conditional. But, yes, they can, and you can learn to recognize the such type of affection as soon as possible. Here are signs to consider:
1. You do not have special moments often
People who love each other without any conditions and are sincere in showing their feelings, do this always when they can. It may be a special date on the roof or a warm picnic in the garden. Actually, the place or time doesn’t matter. People take every opportunity to stay together, enjoy pleasant moments, and forget about other stuff. Couples with conditional love, do not have such special moments often.
2. There is no trust in your couple
It is well known that trust is a cornerstone of all healthy relationships. Still, in the case of conditional love, there is no trust between partners. You do not feel free to share all your ideas and thoughts. You can’t predict the reaction and that’s why you prefer to keep silent. You are afraid of being hurt, and you often think that your relationship may finish at any minute.
3. Partner shows feelings only when there is somebody else
It is a true sign of conditional love. The person behaves opposite to the way they do when you stay face-to-face. Being in public, your significant other may show care and love for you. This is only their way to prove their own perfection and seem to be the ideal partner. But you know the truth, and it is hard for you to understand what is going on actually.
4. You suffer from constant blames
You always feel guilty no matter whether you really did something wrong or not. The partner may blame you all the time even if it is their fault actually. But you should not suffer from this blaming if you didn’t do anything wrong. For instance, you can’t book a room in your favorite hotel because no apartment is available. But the partner may blame you saying that you had to think about booking beforehand.
5. Judgment is present all the time
In the case of conditional love, you always are waiting for evaluating your actions and words. You can’t wait for something good as you are sure that the person will judge you. Even if you try to do your best, you will hardly ever hear a kind word from your significant other. Instead, you hear how disappointed the person is and that you didn’t meet their expectations.
6. Your self-esteem is worsening
You simply can’t stay confident when you always hear how imperfect you are. It is referred to both your appearance and character. As a result, your self-esteem is worsening and you start hesitating about yourself greatly. At some moment, you are sure that you are not good enough, and even do not deserve the best in this life.
7. You can’t understand how you should behave
By listening to constant blames and suffering from daily judgment, at some point you realize that you do not know how you should behave. You are just afraid of doing something wrong again. It is a true example of conditional love because you always have to watch the person’s reaction and worry about the consequences.
8. There is no place for compromises
When a person loves you conditionally, they are not ready to work out any compromise. They want everything to be as they want. You will not be able to discuss any of your ideas or offers. Your partner doesn’t want to listen or accept another point of view. As a result, you act as they want, and nothing can change their opinion.
9. You feel depressed
Due to the absence of support, understanding, and the ability to work out at least some compromises, you may feel depressed. It is evident that your emotional health becomes weaker, and you do not see the way out. Your mental health is at big risk because of so terrible background. Some people even start suffering from panic attacks.
Unconditional Love vs Conditional Love: What to Choose?
What does conditional love mean? It means that your partner doesn’t love you sincerely. They are ready to give their love only if you are, for example: in a good shape, with clean skin, work for a prestigious company, go in for sport, don’t smoke, love animals, etc. Actually, the conditions may be different and vary from couple to couple. Still, the result is all the same – you can’t relax, and enjoy a healthy relationship to the fullest.
Everything happens differently with unconditional love. It is the connection of two people who are ready to accept all strengths and drawbacks of each other. They don’t mind looking for compromises, working on relationships, and being together no matter what is going on outside. True love is an amazing feeling, and those who are lucky to meet the right person and build strong commitment, are the happiest people in the world. Knowing such an incredible gap between unconditional and conditional love, it’s your turn to decide what you want to devote your life to.
Summing – up
If after learning the signs of unconditional love and analyzing your relationships you understand that it is just such a commitment you are in, then you need to act immediately. Of course, if you are not ready to leave everything as it is. It is important to have an honest conversation with your significant other. Share your feelings and say what you are not satisfied with. In case the partner really wants to be with you, then you can work out something together, and get a good result. For example, you can start new activities, spend more time together, approach a therapist, etc. In case the person doesn’t see any problem and keeps blaming and judging you, then perhaps, you will have to either put up with the situation or leave. In any case, the decision will not be simple, and you are highly recommended to mind your own needs and expectations so as not to regret lost time afterward.